Aside from the wall issues in the garage, there's also this crack that starts at the foot of the driveway and continues clear through the garage to the back wall. It's like there's a fault line running down the property.
Last weekend I got sick of looking at it so I got out the bucket of vinyl concrete sealant that I'd picked up from Home Depot over a year ago (back when I had all these big plans to get stuff like this taken care of right away.) A little bit of water, a little bit of crawling on my knees with a trowel, and now I don't have to worry about dropping my keys down into the crack and losing them forever. Let's hope the solution sticks.